Specific Entrigue

– so I have to go to see my trauma counsellor today –

not because I am traumatized anymore  – but I still see to help me cope with the very difficult aftermath of having been traumatized on the recovery road to healing and becoming a whole person again

– but to ask her – if she wants to author a paper about me – and how I recovered from a trauma that most other people never recover from.

Workplace Bullying.

and if people can’t get over that – how are they supposed to be able to get over far far far worse?

and I know how I got through it – and it’s because

(pause for dramatic effect)

I never was traumatized by anything before in my life.

Even though, I have had tragedy in my life – because other people died and I lost them. One of them, I was even the person who discovered the body – my favorite uncle – Gus – who had a heart attack and died in the bathroom of the home that he lived in alone.

Just like Elvis.

But Elvis’s home was full of people, who weren’t paying attention to him – because to them, he was the King – and Elvis the man, lived all alone.

But I was never traumatized – and here’s why I think that I wasn’t:

when I was 5 – essentially, told an adult pedophile to fuck off – and he was scared by me – and when I told my parents – they beleived me – and it caused my aunt, who’s boyfriend it was – to leave the family for 10 years.

and that experience, made it possible for me at age 12

to be approached by Clifford Olsen – the Beast of BC – a sexual predator and murderer of children and teens –

and for me to walk away from him and not be lured by him

because – the look on his face – was the same look as the predator I met when I was 5 – and that one, only wanted to touch me and my sister – Olsen wanted to sexually torture me for a few days then kill what was left of me.

so – I don’t care what kind of predator people are – if it’s just a GOP or MEAN GIRL or a murderous pedophile.

because – in my experience – there’s no difference between these types of people.

and – most people – I think, have a sense of when they are being preyed upon – especially when so distracted by predators who make them pray for protection and deliverance from predation – and I am not going to finish this thought or connect any more dots to this – and just let everyone wonder – who all, that I am calling


because – the thing about predators is that most of them – are not very smart – because – if you know what to pay attention to – you can know how to hide your intentions.

But, when a predator’s intention is based in callous indifference to other people – especially people they think are their prey….even if they say it pray ……

then, it’s not difficult – to sort out the lambs from the wolves.

But, wolves, never know – when they are looking at a lamb or a sheep or another wolf in sheep clothing.

Well, bad predators know wolves in sheep outfits – because they admire those bad wolves who have learned to live and hide with all the sheep – because then, the sheep, never see the attack coming.

But – no one – can tell – what a predator who has only good intentions and actually best interests of the whole flock or herd.

Because – the kind of predator that I am – is Alya – Clan of the Cave Bear.

Who wasn’t allowed to hunt because women couldn’t do that in the clan – so she taught herself to hunt, by hunting the predators who threatened her clan – directly as being harmful to children and indirectly as stealers of food and game.

so – I was bullied in the workplace.

But I have worked in many places and with many people.

And the only workplace that was rigid enough and zero-sum hammer management – who cared nothing for the policies and legislation that governed the workplace was one workplace:

The Federal Civil Service of Canada.

and I told everyone I met – that I could do their jobs, better than them, and I was prepared to bet them $50.

I worked – for 13 years – in 8 Branches of 7 Departments – and I interviewed with over a thousand manages for jobs that they thought – they weren’t offering me.

Because I didn’t do “well enough” on the written examinations or in the verbal interview and exams.

But I said – I told everyone – $50 says I can do your job better than you.

And when I knew they were not betting people, I made sure they did not offer to hire me – because, I knew – they were a bully – the weakest of all the predators.

And the easiest to avoid. Until.

Department 7 – which is not being operated by the RDG as a Civilian Government Administration – but as a Military Style – Top Down – All Hammer Management All the Time.

So – I asked to be allowed to leave in a way that would have allowed me to move to Department 8 – where I had already twice failed to get the job that I wanted – to retire from.

And I had the best interview of my life – and I mean that becasue I have done over 5000 interviews in my career – because –

the computer in high school told me – in 1984 – that there were only 2 jobs in a job database of 10,000 possible careers – that :

if I included all my interests and skills, there were ZERO careers for me.

But, when I scaled back to my critical interests, there were TWO jobs for me.

One: Movie Producer

a job barely possible in Canada, owing to the Treaty between Canada and America signed after WWII about Canada not developing an Indigenous Film Industry – but being a Service Sector to American Films – and that’s the state of the Canadian film industry – We Service America

dot dot dot

Two: Prime Minster of Canada.

Now – the interesting thing to me was – that when I told my career counsellor what the two jobs where, her response was:

We really need an intelligent and funny woman to be Prime Minister of Canada.

You should go to law school.

Now – I don’ t know what career options or feedback that my school peers got in 1984 – or what they did or didn’t do –

But I thought about both of those jobs – and I am – despite being a lesbian, social justice advocate, creative writer, graphic artist, event planner, media marketer, community organizer, Information Management, Workflow Analyst, Emergency Preparedness, Threat and Risk Assessment, Accommodations and Facilities Coordinator and Subject Matter Expert in Government Policy and Legislation –

I have realized – what – my high school counsellor already knew.

But I am old fashioned and I know so much, that I have to learn things, the hard way – by putting in the work and learning – from the ground up.

And I have told every person that I worked with or for or against – in government – for 13 Years, 7 Departments and 8 Branches –

I bet you $50 that I can do your job, better than you.

and the funny part – what most bothered them – is that they knew, that I had no clue – what – precisely – their job was.

Now – there’s a lot of people – who don’t understand that they owe me $50.

And I am willing to be nice – and – not only  – not ask for the $50 from each person (13 years, 8 branches, 7 Departments)

I have also never asked for the Bonus that Federal Employees are offered for being innovative and identifying workplace cost savings – of 1% of the cost saved.

and, to give Canada and Canadians – the level of work and savings that I – Nina Tryggvason – and Nina Tryggvason Alone – saved Canada.

I would like everyone to think about – a news story that is in the papers – the National Post specifically – about the problems of Indian and Northern Affairs and how much money the Status Card program –

now, if you aren’t sure what a Status Card is – it is because you are not native to Canada – and the Status Card is reserved for people – the first people in Canada – that the European Ancestors of most Canadians – who are European descendants – took lands and forced the first peoples onto reservations.

Now – before people who have seen me – open their mouths to protest.

I must point out – that I am Canadian – I was born here and my Mom’s family was here for 6 generations – from the Ukraine – the whipping country of Eastern Europe. They were refugees – not conquistadors or missionaries. They settled in Saskatchewan and became farmers. On land they were told was cleared and ready for settlement.

I am Canadian – my Dad immigrated here in the 1950’s when he was 6. From Iceland. Which is NOT European – it’s Scandinavian.

And when, my Viking ancestors first came to Canada – now, I am not related to Leif the Lucky or his father, Eric the Red, who founded Greenland after he was exiled from Iceland after he murdered his nieghbour over a property boundary dispute. and he when to Greenland to establish his own kingdom and called that icey place – Greenland to sucker people into coming – because in those days – around a thousand years ago – when you travelled to a new place – there was no turning back – becasue that’s how hazardous the journey was.

But when my SPECIFIC viking ancestors came to Canada – they were part of the expedition of Freydis Eiriksdottir – the daughter of Eric the Red and sister to Leif the Lucky or Leif Eirikson.

and there’s many many books written about Freydis Eiriksdottir

But these were not my specific ancestors – Eric the Red is just one Viking of many.

My ancestor was on the expedition to what the Vikings called Vineland, Marklund and Hellund – what Canada refers to as the Maritime Provinces – and what Americans think of as New England…..

The Freydis expedition to a specific location that Leif the Lucky landed at: Leifdbudir.

An expedition that Freydis hoped would improve her family name and position – and she came away with nothing but sorrow.

While my ancestors – Helgi and Finnbogi Egilsson – who went along for the adventure and to return with treasure – went home with a ship loaded with timber and resources and a living child born in Canada – the first non-native born in Canada who lived –

(read: Caucasian, not that that means anything, because we are all people who reflect the range of human adaptivity [what we wrongfully and imprecisely call “diversity”] through our physical adaptions to our native climate and the differences between any two humans from anywhere in the world is less than 1% genetic difference – so you can now do the math and see how stupid bigotry about skin colour is – 7 billion people, less than 1% different from each other, in case simple genetic math is intimidating to see to the simple self evident math to anyone who can understand genetics)

Now – Europeans know and history buff know that Vikings were the terror of Europe. We were unstoppable and we invaded and took what we wanted and we invaded again and stayed and became warlord kings and we invaded and invaded and invaded.

So, what the world needs to understand – is: the Vikings who invaded Europe – those were the young men who were underfoot and bothering us Women Vikings – so we had to make them go and play and get out of the yard – and come home – when it was time to harvest OUR CROPS – with all those Irish mostly, but also other Europeans that the Vikings brought home to be labourers – NOT SLAVES per -se – because

the Vikings only survived the Black Death that laid Europe to waste – because they didn’t just keep those Europeans as slaves, they dated and mated – and blended the strongest and the smartest and the toughest – and Iceland – wasn’t that harmed by Black Death.

It took something far more sinister to conquer the Vikings. dot dot dot …

But – what is important – is that the Vikings kept invading and conquering Europe in a terrifying wave after wave of horny and horned warriors out for a summer stroll – what Europe considered Pillaging –

Is that when – the Vikings came to what became Canada and America – they got along with the native peoples – whom they called Skraelings.

Some even stayed and married into Inuit Populations – farther north and nearer Greenland.

But the ones who came to what in Modern Terms is Canada’s Maritimes and America’s New England States – is that – the aboriginals who were there – and who traded with the Vikings – a 1000 years ago – centuries before Amerigo Vespucci and the later Christopher Columbus (who’s only real claim to fame was bringing Syphilis to Europe from the Caribbean) ….

is that when things went pear shaped between the Vikings and the Skraelings – the Vikings got the hell away from the Skraeling land – never knowing how vast it was – they just realized – and this is important:

Vikings – the scourge of Europe – realized that the Skraelings in Vineland – were too powerful to conquer – because the Viking could never land with enough forces – because they didn’ t know – how many skraelings there were.

And it was not cost effective enough, with Europe – being so much closer – and with more valuables than just the raw materials available in Vineland.

After all, once you have all the timber for the roof and walls – anything else that is in Vineland – is just more work – and Europeans – were making all those pretty gold and gem studded shiny things.

But Europeans – and I think that it’s a little bit the fault of the Vikings and Skraelings, we’re sorry – we didn’ t know – couldn’t have known that Europeans were smarting from the bruising that we gave them – because to us –

being a Raider Viking, was the summer job you did until the crops were ready for harvest.

And Europeans, were too afraid to come and look for us Vikings and they took out their frustrations on you – the natives of the Americas – from North (to Alaska) to South (to Peru and Argentina).

But, you have to understand – you Skraelings – scared the hell out of the Vikings – so when we saw Europe – going after you – we didn’t understand something then.

Germ Theory.

Because, Europe never defeated any Skraelings in the Americas – it was the germs that were along for the ride inside the Europeans.

Who also, didn’t understand germ theory – so they thought, that when the nations of the Americas fell – that it has anything to do with the Europeans.

but it only had anything to do with the germs – bacteria and virsuses – that Europeans brought with them – from all over the whole of the known to European worlds – and the natives of the Americas

thought they were fighting Ghostly People – and directly, they were.

but Ghost People did not defeat the peoples of the Americas – it was bacteria and viruses brought inside Ghost People –

because the world is divided – between hats and feathers

and there are many kinds of hats

while the hats are all representive of the type of person and their civilization – each type of hat – means something a little more different from the other hats.

now – I have totally lost track of what I was trying to say – because I got carried away with all my Vikingness.

so – let me say this:

sip of water. deep cleansing breath.

I told everyone that I met in Government – 8 Branches, 7 Departments spanning 13 years.

I told everyone on my blog – that I am at home – on employee disability – because I was bullied in the workplace – and that Workplace is

The Federal Government of Canada.

So I have a lot of $50 prize winnings, and I have a lot of 1% bonus check for the savings that I created for Canada. – wait – right.

When I was at Indian and Northern Affairs – I wrote a report about the problems of the Status Card Program.

I said – in 1999/2000 – that: the problems were:

– the card was last designed in 1985 and the security feature was that the card was pre-printed in red so it could not be copied on machines – that in 1985 – were not able to read “the colour red” by design – and in 1999, we had scanners that anyone could buy for their homes that could recognize 16 million colours – so reading red was not longer designed into machines.

– Further, I wrote – that the card was not anything that the people who were forced to have this card – now I am not going to finish this thought in this blog – but I want people to let thier minds wander about and settle on an uncomfortable thought:

which historic governments  forced special identifiers onto narrow segments of a mass population – to separate then and make or keep them separate from being part of the mainstream (dot dot dot)….

and what happens to marginalized population groups who are prevented from mainstreaming (dot dot dot)….

Now I am going to not say anything more about my report – and I am linking to a search of the National Post Website, using the key words

“Indian and Northern Affairs”

and here’s what I know that I can share:

My report, which was not just about how to design a Government Issued Identification card – because my report – was actually about – the problems of the relationship between the INAC Department and their only clients:

The descendants of the peoples who formed the first nations of these lands – that we now call Canada and America.

And my report, incorporated, not just card design concerns – but addresses the loss of over $1 billion dollars being spend and lost annually in Canada – across not only INAC’s budget – but also Health Canada, Service Canada, every Provincial Ministry, every Federal , Provincial and Municipal Police force and the Local Health Authorities, Hospitals and regional/provincial health costs.

And that only took me – 2 weeks to find a way to save Canada – $1 billion dollars annually – and when I took my report to the manager – of the Lands and Trust Branch in Vancouver’s Regional Office.

Well, let’s just say this for me – You all might think that you know what a white person looks like – and if you think it’s Caucasian – You are absolutely WRONG.

Because to me – a White Person – is a person who I just told something to – and all the blood drained right out of their faces – and it doesn’t matter what colour that face is.

A pale face is one without blood – not the colour of the skin of said face.

Now – my INAC report – the manager told me – All this data you mention – was known – but no one had ever put it together before like you did and more importantly, no one has ever been able to connect what was wrong – so clearly – to what specific things, that we were doing as a department.

He wanted to give my Regional Report to Ottawa.

I said, let me do a new draft – that just has the parts that Ottawa needs – and not the region.

Well, I left INAC – I was only there for 9 months on an acting assignment – I worked for RCMP.

Where, not once, but twice – my Ottawa Report – that I intentionally DID NOT CLASSIFY – SO THAT IT WOULD BE AVAILABLE FOR THE PEOPLE FOR WHOM IT WAS WRITTEN: Canadians.

Would be able to access information about their government and how it was or was not serving Canadians.

and tomorrow – I will start to explain – exactly – how Canadians can access information, being held in trust, by Government – not just the civil service part – but the Parliament Part of Government. Because all the information that is held by the Government is being held – in trust – for Canadians.

Who have learned, not to trust the government – for varied and good reasons.

But, that doesn’t mean that the public should not be able to trust – the Public Service of Canada – because the people who make up that group – over 200,000 of us across 168 Federal Departments – and however many Provincial or Territorial Ministries – and Municipal level – there are.

The Government of Canada is being operated by the middle class rank and file that IS CANADA.

and I am one of you – and I am telling – that the government of Canada is not working for Canadians – and I don’t know who they are working for – but, I can tell you this:

the Policy and legislation tells us how – the minimum – we are supposed to achieve

and many people inside, think it’s the maximum and they are not trying every hard to achieve that minimum or even minimal level

because policy and legislation, that’s an Ottawa thing and we don’ t play that way in the regions.

to which, I say: Really? Then, I bet you $50, I can do your job better than you.

8 Branches, 7 Departments over thirteen years.

and I am not telling which branches, which departments or in which years.

Except to say:

I am linking to a search of the National Post Website, using the key words

“Indian and Northern Affairs”

they wrote – twice – on their front page – about that report, that I wrote for Ottawa about the status card program – that they updated the card – and never paid me my 1% of the billion dollars a year savings that I created for ALL OF CANADA.

(and all those articles linked to – were run after the articles that told Canadians – all about my report.)

and I only worked for 2 weeks on that report of the 9 months that I worked on assignment at Indian and Northern Affairs Canada.

So – HERE’S What I want:

$50 – From Stephen Harper – the current Prime Minister of the Government of the Day –

because, I knew, in 1984 – that there were only two jobs that I would be challenging enough for me – and one of them – came with chairs that were printed with NAMES ON THEM

and the other chair – the one in Ottawa – has no names, because that chair, belongs to a position – not a person – who is put there – when they demonstrate – how hard they are willing to work for Canadians.

Or work over Canadians – it gets confusing for me – because

I worked for 13 years in 7 Departments and 8 Branches – because of the wide spread bulling and abuse that goes on – inside government departments.

And yes, I get the whole Snivel Servant attitude that Canadians feel towards people who have jobs for life.

Because you don’t know about lifers – is that the only ones who have a chance for freedom – are the ones who have to go to parole hearings to get a chance to be a normal person again and get to leave prison.

So – I am asking Canadians – to stop punishing the Liberals for spending money to keep Canada together and remove Stephen Harper from the chair of the position – that has had my name in pencil on it since 1984.

Because I know Stephen Harper is a Star Trek Fan and I know who he is – in the Star Trek Universe – and it is a character from The Original Series – but it’s not anyone who served on the Enterprise.

and for Stephen Harper’s purposes and everyone’s reference –

Nina Tryggvason, Federal Public Service Employee of 13 years and 7 Departments – was Tasha Yar.

And I am not telling, who in the Star Trek Universe that – Nina Tryggvason – Blogger and person in recovery from Workplace Bullying is – but I will say, it’s not anyone from The Next Generation who served on the Enterprise – but, it was a regular character who dropped in, from time to time.

Now – Stephen Harper led a public life – so Google him about his history and past groups and associations.

Nina Tryggvason – also led a public life – so Google me too.

But I worked in 8 Branches of 7 Departments over 13 years – so I learned about government – the oldest fashion way – I started – in the mail-room at Revenue Canada – before it became an Agency in what only made sense to me as a Union busting move by the Government of the Day.

But before the NDP and PSAC get all excited – I have to tell you – that the government of the day – is only HALF of the problem for the real government:

The Civilian Federal Public Service – of 168 Departments – and the Provincial and Municipal – as we say in the government biz – Stakeholders and Consultants – because we don’t want Canadians groups to get above the role that they are assigned – consultants – not negotiators at the same table.

But, to the civil service – we serve stakeholders – while the political government of Canada only considers them to be consultants – without any stakes with which to negotiate.


whew, I had to explain all that – to ensure that everyone understood all the imporant messages and what I mean when I ask – you – my readers and followers of Random Ntrygg – because now I am Specific Ntrygg:

and I am asking you – my readers – wherever you are in the world – to write to Stephen Harper

who told Canadians that his only concern was two things:




but I am telling you – that the Civilian Federal Government was already those things – it’s written into the policies of the workplace – and I don’t know what Harper means by those two things – because – what happened before he was Prime Minister and what has happened since he became Prime Minister

is easily transparent and apparent to anyone paying attention: and there is no obvious accountability under a Prime Minister who is a Hammer Manager.

I am asking the whole world – to help Mr. Harper understand – what the consequences for not telling the truth or at least, not the whole truth, are:

Because – what – Nina Tryggvason – is asking the Whole World to do:

Is write to Stephen Harper and tell him: He owes Nina Tryggvason $50.

Now, I’d rather be a movie producer than Prime Minister – but I go where I am most needed – and if I can save Canada – 1 billion dollars a year – just by changing the design of a Status Card and improving the workflow of the Card Program – without asking for any Offered Employee Incentive –

because I am old fashioned, I do the job, that I am paid to do – for whatever salary is appropriate – because – here’s what I learned working for government:

Hard work is rewarding, but working hard is not smart or rewarding.

So Please – for me – if you think that I am smart enough to be:

Prime Minister of Canada –

please tell Mr Harper that he owes Nina Tryggvason: $50.

Here: http://www.conservative.ca/leader/

Or here: http://pm.gc.ca/eng/index.asp


(unnecessary background)

You can tell him for me – that I worked for 13 Years in 8 Branches of 7 Federal Departments and all those managers – never warned Ottawa about me – because the Regions, solve their own problems their way and not according to the rules and policies of the Treasury Board of Canada (aka Ottawa)

So – Mr Harper is going to find out – exactly – what his kind of Transparency and Accountability means.

Because the Department that Bullied Me – Department 7 – I am not telling anyone – which department it was.

and no one in Department 7 – not in my region and not in Ottawa – has done what they are supposed to do:

Prepare what’s called a QP Card – a mechanism, by which, Departments are supposed to warn their Ministers – about anything that could come up that related to the Department – in Question Period – on live tv from Ottawa to all of Canada.

Now – I want to assure – all of my readers – that I am okay – and I am safe and with my family and recovering from my traumatic experiences at Department 7.

– end backstory –


That MR HARPER’s Government Owes a lot to the people of Canada – who are more interested in a Canada that INCLUDES EVERYONE WHO IS A CITIZEN OR WHO QUALIFIES TO BE ONE

– sidetrip –

than whatever kind of Canada he sees – because

Before 1985 – there was a law that said no queer perverts could work in the government, because being gay was bad and that made you a target of blackmailers.

In 1985 – Canada enacted a new Charter of Rights and Freedoms.

and all the social equality gains that us queer perverts have fought as singles and as couples and collectively – until we achieved marriage equality in 2003.

When Mr. Harper was in opposition – and saying things in Question Period – on tv live from Ottawa – things that if anyone had said the same words in any lunchroom of any Federally manadated workplace – which includes the Parliement – but strangely, not PM wanna bes or Politicians – any person who said such things – would have and could have – been fired for cause.

Now, Mr Harper – promised to leave gay marriage alone – and he has broken that and many other promises that he has made to Canadians generally – but I don’t think he has broken promises made to specific and targeted Canadians.

so of Mr Harper makes you feel uneasy – I say, follow your gut instincts – because – we all know – how to spot the difference between a person who means you harm and one who does not. and sometimes, the worst harm of all is indifference to your suffering and to your person….

– back to the point –

Please tell Mr Harper – that he owes Nina Tryggvason:

$50 – because she can do Prime Minister of ALL OF CANADA – and he’s only prime minister of Part of Canada – and won’t tell anyone which part.


That I am owed a lot of 1% Savings Checks from my work at 8 Branches of 7 Department over 13 years.


That I am owed compensation for being bullied – and this time, it’s just the bulling that happened at Department 7 – because there are bullies everywhere – and it was only at Department 7 – when they prevented me from moving onto Department 8

but I am not sure – how damaged I am – becasue you see – I am a diabetic – it’s tattooed on my wrist – and I was so bullied that became so traumatized that – if not for having – my same gender spouse and my specific family for support – I would be dead or living on the street – and not have spent every day

– pregnant pause –

since June 10, 2010 – when Department 7 used the Vancouver Police to intimidate me and wrongfully apprehend me under section 24 of the British Columbia mental health act – because – when I worked for RCMP – I designed the checklist for RCMP officers to use to conduct an assessment – and in 2010 – the Vancouver Police – had no clear policy and no proceedures in their manual on how to apprehend anyone under that section of the act.

and when I complained – to the BC Police Commission Complaint Office – it wasn’t about the officers who “erred on the side of caution” – public interest served and complaint dismissed.

I complained that the Vancouver Police did not adequately train their officers about how to apprehend people – because police are like people – they think rules are for other people.

So – if the rule don’t help White Middle Class Middle Aged Women in Canada – when they are being victimized by their employer – then it’s no wonder to me – that there is all this bulling in schoold and workplaces – because – rules only work – when they are APPLIED.

And here’s a legal concept explained:

Innocent until Proven Guilty – is a Trial Concept

Not the guiding idea when you are INVESTIGATING complaints to see if there’s enough evidence to take the complaint TO TRIAL.

– breath after pregnant pause –

dot dot dot – catch my breath, calm my self down –

sip of water, sip sip sip –

that I got stuck and took a beating – but I fought the whole of Department 7 – both the Regional Office and the Ottawa HQ office – to a standstill.

And no one prepared a QP Card for the Minister of Department 7.

But I wrote to a Deputy Minister in Department 7 and told her what was going on – because she said – how employees were treated was her primary concern – and she delegated the response to me – back to the Regional Director General of Department 7’s Vancouver Office.

dot dot dot

And I handed PSAC a clean case to win – and they told me – it was too hard to win.

and I tried to tell them, that it wasn’t, because I had already done all the heavy lifting – and I needed was time to recover and I asked PSAC to do their job – and they quit on me – so I asked them for all my dues back – because I never signed my PSAC card at Departments 2 through 6 – because PSAC had already once let me down at Revenue Canada – and PSAC’s Patty Ducharme – has forgotten all about leaving Revenue Canada for her ne wjob with PSAC – and not telling me – leaving me to find out – the day before the 3rd level hearing of the first grievance that I filed – for sexual harassment – because it was a co-worker – another clerk – and NOT A MANAGER – who was touching my person. And not only my person, either. That the union person who demanding control of my case file – and took it away from the union person who was actually helping me to cope and get away from a sexually inappropriate person – who – this is an old story that I tired of telling years ago.

So – no one from the NDP Party should look me up. Ever.

But, I invite the leader of the Green Party to contact me.

Just google: Nina Tryggvason – and maybe you’ll be able to find me.

because, while I know – I could be – Prime Minister of Canada

I’d really rather, just produce movies and tv shows –

not only to entertain people

but mostly – to teach the whole world – how to be just as happy and confident.

about who I am and what I stand for in the world

Randomly and Specifically.

So – Nina Tryggvason – the writer and former Board Member of Women in Film and Video Vancouver – she’s looking for work in the entertainment industry.

Writing and producing – because – you see

what 13 years of Government has done to me is

turned this social butterfly into a agoraphobic who’s scared to leave my house

Department 7, held me down and tore off my wings

and it take a long time, to heal – and wings – do not grow back.

I am at home, on employee benefits on disability – and I can’ t heal or recover, if I think that I have no options but to go back – to Department 7

I asked them to settle and let me walk away in January.

They said no.

They said more things too – astonishing things in writing – that would look like any normal form letter to any one.

but, form letters are not supposed to be written to specific individuals under these kinds of conditions

becasue it is that very informal dismissal of my person

that caused the harm – to start with – and so I know – they are waiting for another chance – because they have my blood on their hands and their mouths

and I see how hungry they looked when they bullied me

because I have been able to spot predators since I was 5 years old

And I can do something about Predators as Prime Minister of Canada

but I would rather – teach the whole world – not only how to spot predators – but how to minimize Predation – in their lives – to protect all that is gold

inside of each and every one of us – who is not a selfish predator

but who are regular people – and the kind of predator that I am –

A Valkyrie – a Nordic Goddess who picks which fallen heros – are brought to Valhalla – to drink and sup – at Odin’s table – with all the gods and godesses and magical creatures that inhabit – maybe not noticably – this world, we call the earth.

and seriously, people. earth? we need a catchier name if we want to make movies about that.

Why I want to be Prime Minister of Canada

Clifford Olsen.

He is the reason that I want to be Prime Minister of Canada.

Because, when I was in grade seven at Richard McBride Elementary School in New Westminster BC – Clifford Olsen molested, kidnapped and murdered more children than he was ever charged with, because the Justice System at the time – much like what was done with Willie Pickton – charge for the minimum number of victims as possible to ensure a life sentence – so as to not create a gold standard for other murderers to surpass.

It’s not because I encountered him and lived to tell – but it is because I was able to face him and not become his victim that I feel an obligation to consider being Prime Minister of Canada.

It’s not entirely because the high school offered a course in career planning and part of that involved entering your work preferences and interests into a computer program called CHOICES that would then crunch through a database of 10,000 jobs and then give you a list of options.

The instructions were to print any results that had fewer than 10 careers.

My first five searches, with all or most of my criteria, unsurprisingly to me but in total shock to the teacher – resulted in zero careers.

I was simply trying to fit too much in – so I had to prioritize and compromise and finally, I was getting jobs for my search results.

The First Result was one job: Prime Minister of Canada.

The next few result lists still had Prime Minister as best suited and Movie Producer as second – other careers included communications/marketing, computer or other sciences, and creative writing/editor – publishing.

I probably still have the dot matrix print outs somewhere.

So the reason why Clifford Olsen makes me want to be Prime Minister is because the Justice System has become a system under which prisoners and accused are ensured a fair trial and that we have actually gone so far as to make the Justice System unresponsive to victims of crime and barely tolerate the families of victims who cannot speak for themselves anymore.

Don’t misunderstand – I am for prisoner rights and safety – and I am even more for the safety of prison guards and administrators – because let’s face it – they are in the prison as a day job – not because they did something wrong.

But I do not see that a system designed to contain the prison population from rioting – by offering “faint hope” of parole, by offering rehabilitation, training and education to allow prisoners the opportunity to become socially capable and responsible citizens upon release – is serving either the prison population or Canadians.

Worse, I do not think there is much justice when the perpetrator of a horrific crime – such as murder – is given every chance possible to become a responsible citizen – and the family of the victim is given no support and no meaningful voice – heck – they are the one who lost a love one – the crime is against that Family more than it is against the Crown or The People.

The loss happened to the family of the victim and they don’t get support that remotely approaches what convicted criminals get – and worse – they have to not only suffer the loss of their loved one – but also have to endure an investigation into their loved one that the impact is often – well, the perp is innocent until proven guilty – so not only do you have to endure the loss of your loved one – but also the idea that they might have brought it upon them self – as appalling an idea that is.

But that’s how it plays in the mind of the family: I have lost my loved one – and this person who is responsible for ending that life – now has to be treated with kid gloves and all kinds of consideration – even when there is little room for doubt – even when the evidence is clear, because one wrong step by police, and the warrant is voided and the evidence is gone from trial consideration.

The need for police procedures and following those procedures is clear. However, I am just going to say this – I would rather Canada have to pay restitution to a wrongfully imprisoned person than allow any obviously by the evidence honestly obtained even if not excessively technically corrected obtained guilty people walk free.

I would reduce the number of wrongfully convicted by ensuring people are not wrongfully arrested at the start or at the least, aren’t taken to trial.

Because the change that I would like to see to the Criminal Justice System is that the police are insulated enough from public and political pressure to not just investigate and arrest whoever is the first good fit.

Remember Clifford Olsen?

My Dad used to jog in Queen Elizabeth Park in New Westminster – probably because he had a beard and because he didn’t have a fancy track suit – the police followed him for a while before Olsen was caught. It was very distressing to know you were being followed by police and weren’t doing anything to warrant it in the best of circumstances so it hasn’t helped by the highly public search for a child killer.

Olsen didn’ t have a beard, the police just had no leads – because when you look at the “solved” murder figures – most murders are solvable because the murderer is known to the victim. Stranger murders, lacking the victim connection, are harder to generate leads or investigation headway.

But that’s not why Olsen makes me want to be Prime Minister.

It was Olsen using the faint hope process and whatever press access he had from solitary confinement – that allowed Olsen to continue to physiologically torture the victim families, and his living victims, specifically and British Columbians generally.

That’s not justice for anyone and it’s an extension of prisoner rights beyond personal safety and Charter Right guarantees.

And if people are so concerned that law abiding gays and lesbians not be given “special rights” – special in this case being the same rights applied meaningfully to the individual circumstance – then I have to wonder – if law abiding gays and lesbians can’t have special rights – why then are criminals and prisoners allowed not only special rights, but vigilant protection of their range of rights by the provincial and federal government?

Why are victims and their families or the families of victims – given the least consideration, protection and the smallest voice? Haven’t they been victimized enough without Establishment marginalizing victims and their families even more?

For a party that rode into Ottawa on a law and order victim rights agenda – the Reform turned CCRAP (remember when they called themselves Canadian Conservative Reform Alliance Party? they shoulda had to have kept that name) to whatever they are now being helmed by Mr. Stephen Harper; I can’t say that the party’s treatment of former MP Chuck Cadman gave me the impression that they cared about victims.

And I am a bit baffled by the Widow Cadman both suing the party for how they treated her husband AND being the Conservative MP in Chuck’s riding – the first riding in Canada to ever elect an Independant MP – Chuck Cadman after he was ousted by the party in favour of another candidate – who – I don’t recall if the Conservative Candidate got any votes, whoever it was.

In any event, although he was originally elected within a party that I am not likely to ever join, Chuck Cadman was an outstanding MP who became the first elected independent and he cast the critical vote that extended the Paul Martin government of that day.

But I don’t have any impression of his widow as an MP. No clue about her whatsoever. I don’t know if no impression is accurate, but I rarely read the local community papers – so maybe someone out there can comment here about Donna Cadman, MP?

It’s all very confusing when you look at the facts absent of context, but context leads to editorial and that often leads to …. probably some kind of lawsuit.

So, I want to be Prime Minister of Canada because I have always stood up against bullies and protected their intended targets from harm.

Which is a little bit what Canada does on an international scale – Canada is Peacekeeping – and we punch above our weight class because we have America to the south who we ride along with.

And Canadians are good with that – we don’t want to run the world, we just want to help make the world run a little more peacefully for everyone.

The world needs more Canada – not Canada the American Lite Edition.

The world needs more of traditional Canada – human rights equality, peacekeeping, universal health care and more.

Because governments should execute laws on behalf of citizens, not execute citizens or enact persecution laws or worse, undermine the existing laws and dismantle the social safety net.

Because it’s a lot cheaper to prevent crime through poverty reduction, legalized marijuana and decriminalized other drugs, through public eduction & health, grants & contributions for small business and fostering a society where everyone’s survival needs are met and the only limit to anyone’s thrive-al needs is down to their own hard work and talent – than to manage crime and build more prisons – aka prisoner universities and Club Fed resorts.

In fact, shouldn’t everyone be concerned that the current government of the day is planning to build more prisons while allowing Canada to no longer be the world’s leader of medical radioactive isotopes?

Shouldn’t everyone be concerned that some of the first things that PM Harper did upon taking office was shutting down the Charter Challenge program and gutting The Department of Status of Women? And slashing arts and community event funding? And now, despite his promise to accept Canadians acceptance of marriage equality, somehow, gay marriage is front page news again?

Do we really want a government who is more interested in imprisoning Canadians than ensuring employment and economic opportunity?

Do we really want anyone as Prime Minister who’s Canada doesn’t include everyone who’s already part of Canada?

Manic Adjustment

I wanted to talk about something about Canada that’s not working for me today.

But circumstances vary day to day and I am feeling a little blue and a little vulnerable – so I can’t talk or even think about what’s not working because I don’t think that I can avoid falling int a pit of despair.

So I am going to go play Fallout: New Vegas – a Post Apocalyptic game with strong cowboy frontier vibes and a Vegas Elvis undertone and go roam the wasteland doing good deed for Pixel People (in game characters) until I feel a little bit better about being in the world and I may be back later today to talk about the Canadian Criminal Justice System and how we have to assure basic personal sovergienty rights to prisoners, but must not allow prisoners to continue to victimize their victims or their victim’s families from inside prison during their incarceration.

Because the point of prison was to allow the public and victims of crime to feel safe in society again – and as long as prisoners – like Clifford Olsen – was allowed to constantly torture and torment the families of his victims and the victims who never had their day in court against him – Olsen was free to continue to entertain himself at the psychological expense of everyone else who’s lives he had already ruined or stolen or tried to take or interfere with.

The purpose of prison is not to allow criminals to set up a base camp to continue their terror campaigns of the public – but to retrain, restore, redress and if necessary, to restrain those that would do harm to vulnerable citizens.

But instead of being a corrective process – prisons have become a government operated Criminal University and Club Fed for when criminal life gets too difficult and you just need to get away and have your life simplified and taken care of for you – until you’re ready to be parolled or released and back to your criminal antics or even bigger ones after study and reflection.

Anyway, I’m off to go roam New Vegas and do some good deeds, even if just for pixel people.



Good Riddance

There are times that I wish that I was religious, rare, but times nonetheless. To have a sense that there’s justice in the universe, a reckoning at the end of our day, instead of just the relief of closure. But there being no evidence to support any supernatural claims, closure will have to do.

Clifford Olsen, the stealer of childhood and convicted child murderer, is dying of cancer and reportedly, hasn’t long to live.

Calling himself the “Beast of BC”, Olsen kidnapped, raped, tortured and murdered children and teens. He was convicted for far fewer deaths than he claims to have committed, and he confessed to police in 1981 and brokered a payment deal in exchange for the locations of the bodies. His wife accepted the money, saying that her son was losing his father and deserved the money as compensation.

Unlike the wife and son, Olsen continued to assert himself into the media, seeking every parole opportunity to grab for headlines and to continue to torture the families. In 1989, he was quoted as saying: “There’s nothing I can say to the parents of those children, I’m a Christian and they’re my brothers and sisters … As far as I’m concerned, they’re before God today. I’ve asked for forgiveness, I’ve been forgiven, and that’s the end of it.”

So it’s fitting that this man’s death make the headlines, he is reviled and every day that he draws breath is an affront, a continued assault on the remaining families of his victims. But even if there’s no final justice, at least, there can be closure, he’s going to die and apparently, he’s getting the level of media attention he finally deserves, less notice than a ridiculous nuisance lawsuit:

I was 12 when Olsen was hunting children. My cousins went to school with one of his victims and my future spouse’s family moved into the home vacated by one victim family. Many British Columbians in the lower mainland had brushes with Olsen.

I grew up in New Westminster and I had a paper route in the Sapperton area. It was there that I encountered Olsen and lived to tell. It’s not a story that I share often, it raises complicated emotions for me. But, I think of the Gavin de Becker book – The Gift of Fear, and I realize that these stories need to be told, so others can learn and apply the lessons.

But, it was a pleasant day and I had gone to the hobby store. I left the store with my model car and headed home.

A man, pleasant appearing enough, asked me what I had in the paper bag.

I hesitated to talk to him. I was aware from the newspapers, school, parents that there was a dangerous predator about.

He seemed to know that argument and he reassured me that he was known to my parents, that he had met me and my mom in the ice cream shop, right beside the hobby store, the week before.

Now, I knew that I had not been in the ice cream shop with my Mom the week before, but my younger sister had. So I thought that he had simply confused us.

The inclination of people is to get along, be nice, not treat people as suspect – and predators know this.

Any person who wasn’t seeking to harm me, simply would have continued down the sidewalk – that this man took interest in me alone is a hindsight clue that there was something untoward.

And predators know how to stalk their prey – women and children are especially are vulnerable because of the socializing about being deferential.

So, I explained that it was a model car, that I liked to build models. He asked how many I had done. The exchange was pleasant enough. He kept his physical distance and there were other people on the street. Nothing untoward at all.

I relaxed, even though I knew I was supposed to be returning directly home and not stopping to talk to other people. My parents had been nervous about letting me out alone.

When Olsen saw that I had become comfortable, he stepped closer and asked if I would be interested in a model ship, that he had one and wasn’t any good at building.

This made me uncomfortable, but not enough to break away. I agreed, vaguely, that it would be interesting. I had done a model of the Santa Maria the year before. I asked what kind of ship model it was.

He put his hand on my arm, just above the elbow and said “Let’s go to my place now and I’ll show you.”

The discomfort in my brain turned into alarm bells. When he raised the stakes from a conversation on the street to touching me, all deference and courtesy was gone. The stakes became too high and he had not lulled and assured me sufficiently to go anywhere alone with him.

I said that I was expected home and was in fact, already late and that my dad would be coming to look for me.

He let me go right away. We were on the street and all I had to do was scream.

We parted and I ran home, ashamed, humiliated, embarrassed. I didn’t want to tell anyone, I didn’t want to beleive that I had been that stupid to talk to him, when I knew, I knew that the ice cream shop story wasn’t true.

Olsen was arrested shortly after and I convinced myself that the person in the encounter wasn’t him. I put all thoughts of him out of my mind and I purposely didn’t follow the news stories about him.

When I was in my mid 20’s, Olsen applied for parole under the faint hope clause. I was still adverse to any news about him, but a lawyer that I worked for, did work for the John Howard Society and he had been interviewed for the news program to talk about the faint hope clause – not Olsen. So I watched my boss on the news.

Then, they showed the file footage of Olsen’s arrest.

I went into shock. My body shook, I emotionally numbed and I started crying.

I couldn’t deny it – it had been him on the street. I had come a conversation closeness to being a name on a list of victims.

For a while, I read everything and learned what a nightmare Olsen had been and that he hadn’t been charged with anything because the police don’t like to help criminals set records – it only encourages other criminals to set a new one.

The book, The Gift of Fear, explains that we already have the skill and ability to recognize danger. It’s what our primal brains do best – alert us to dangers – and there’s little downside to reacting fearfully and leaving an area or encounter.

But, we socialize ourselves to not trust ourselves. We’re taught to respect and obey our elders, to be deferential to authority – and authority continues to be assumed to be male.

Doing that, would have resulted in a terrible death.

Paying attention to surroundings and the conversation – to not gloss over inconsistencies and outright wrongness – I had not met Olsen with my mom, since I hadn’t been in the ice cream shop at all.

He just guessed that since I had been in the hobby store that I would likely have been in the ice cream shop too. It’s not that different than cold readings done by those scammers who claim to be able to communicate with the dead. We ignore the misses and fill in the information needed to make their claims seem true enough to go along with – sometimes just with the risk to our wallets, but sometimes, like that time, to our very life.

Knowing how predators operate is the best way to safeguard against them.

If I had been operating with safety as a more mindful thing – rather than going about my day assuming that nothing untoward would happen – I would not have stopped to talk to him at all. I would have said, sorry, I’m expected home and continued on my way.

There were too many people around to be witnesses, there was no danger of being snatched – Olsen’s tactics was to lure kids under their own power – help me find my lost puppy type of tactic.

In any case, I got over the bout of survivor guilt – maybe if I’d screamed and raised a fuss, Olsen would have been caught sooner – but I was 12 and frankly, getting away unscathed, was pretty much my capacity and best case scenario.